Chaos is the name for any order that produces confusion in our minds
- George Santayana
England : 1st innings 102; Australia : 1st innings 196-4 (day one, stumps)
Yesterday was hideous. Utter carnage. Chaos from the off. The team were disturbed by a fire alarm in their hotel at 4am in the morning and the portents soon multiplied by the minute. Freddie's absence was confirmed on waking, then Prior got injured in the warm up attempting to play football and the toss was delayed. Colly donned the gloves on the outfield with The Teeth pole-axed and we feared that we would begin the test without our first choice wicketkeeper as well as the Titans - Flintoff and KP. After an anxious wait, Brocket announced the team and Prior was deemed to be fit to start. GBH came into the side as we elected to stick with five bowlers rather than strengthen our batting line-up with the introduction of The Pig's Trotter.
A catastrophic batting performance ensued and our worst innings total in the Ashes since 1997 has left our hopes of regaining the urn very much in the balance. A total of 102 runs when batting first in abysmal. We staged a mitigated fight-back by taking four Aussie wickets in their first innings but there is no way we can win this test now. The series will be decided at The Oval.
I will write a lengthy report soon but I wanted to write this morning to share my condolences with you all. Watching our performance yesterday was a traumatic experience. Following England should come with a health warning. Barmy Army Membership is not for the faint of heart... Here's hoping we can salvage some pride today.
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